I love
history.
And it feels good to be a part of it now. Especially with this
election, where we find ourselves in our politics? Soon we will be history.
That’s what they say right? How does that feel, to paraphrase Bob Dylan:
'To be
on our own, with no direction home, like a complete unknown, So Washington
might as well be singing stoned ?
Well people
who legitimately have something to lose if a man child who is every bad ‘ist’ there
is becomes president have legitimate concern.
I’ll be ok.
I’m a white man. The worst that can happen with me in this election is that I
lose friends and when the SS. I mean the Team Trumps come to my door and say “DO
YOU KNOW THEM?!?!?” I’ll do my best Peter disciple from the Bible impression
and be like “Huh? I never saw them before in my life. They aren’t the good ones!!!!!!”
(And Trumps Cock will crow 3 times)
If the internet goes out. Then and only then will I give a shit.
Seriously most people are upset with this notion of building a wall to keep people at bay but if Trump and others like him came out to say,
“Folk, look.
Terror is up. Morale is down. ISIS. ISIS. They’re recruiting on the internet.
We have to shut it down!”
White people
would line up to vote faster than the
first season of American Idol. (JUSTIN YOU SHOULD HAVE WON!!!!)
They say
history is written by the winners. But if Trump were to become president you
can legitimately say a BIG WHINEY LOSER wrote history.
People say
it's the end every four years, that it’s the SIGN OF THE APOCALYPSE. Trump is
the Sign of the Apocalypse
Perhaps.
Everyone’s got their own sign of the
apocalypse though.
What I think is the
SIGN OF MY APOCALYPSE is that I’ve realized that I have over 350 friends on
Facebook and maybe 2 friends in real life. 3 on a good day. 3 if I pick up my
phone. And I’m ok with that. And I don’t include my wife in that list ok? You
hear these people “I married my best friend.” “My wife or my husband is my best
friend.” Bullshit. That’s great for you, but when I was a young little
malfeasant pimply misogynisticly inclined piece of dog shit I used to egg
houses with my friends, prank businesses using the yellow pages, and brag about
what sex I was getting if my hand to dick was actually fucking Selma Hayek . I
don’t do that with my wife. I like having a wife. I don’t say things
like, “Hey honey, look! The shit I took looks like Kramer from Seinfeld!”
I digress.
HISTORY!
We take it
out of context, history. Any type of history. I love musical history. And in this new
culture we find ourselves in where facts are a thing of the past (hey kind of like history!) I’m waiting
for the moment were I read about a GUN SHOW that includes a John Lennon
inspired Glock 9MM with the slogan “GIVE THIS PIECE A CHANCE’. Yeah They’d be
playing Happiness is a Warm Gun And if you act now the makers will autograph a
copy of Catcher In the Rye. Give me a break! And while you’re at it I will have
a Kit-Kat bar!
.......give me a break.
Or Martin
Luther King Jr. As a child we read about Dr. King the same way you learn about
the Beatles as a kid. Dr. King had a dream. The Beatles were on Ed Sullivan.
For both analogies pay no more attention to what they did after!
Cue Leslie
Nielsen: “Nothing to see here! Please disperse! Nothing to see here!”
(Kid raising
his hand): “Well before he organized one of the largest bus boycotts and after
he went after the US for their involvement in Vietnam and didn’t he die
protesting workers rights, to be specific sanitation workers rights in Memphis?
This kind of pissed off liberals and conservatives who may have attached his
name to less controversial stances? ”
Teacher: "Ok,
that’s enough. Go see the Principal. "
I think it’s
worth mentioning that we have a holiday celebrating a man who was once on the
FBI’s most watched list. (Kind of redefines for people what a Patriot is) Not
someone who deflates a football, but who inflates our better nature.
It might be
cool to teach kids at the youngest of ages then to question everything they
read and hear from adults? Problem is you can’t really grade that kind of intelligence,
can you? Or maybe you can? I don't know grade me.
I digress.
We are at an
interesting time in our collective young countries’ conscious though.
Regardless of the outcome we do have a huge knowledge disparity in everyone’s
own bubble of comfort. And it's a lot of Southern Comfort.
(ahh the racism isn't as evident as menacing dogs and blasts of water, it's more your 'what are you doing here?' light racism. Goes down smooth.)
The internet
and social media, while a successful tool at times, has become the giant yard
sign, not just informing your view, but condemning others with a condescending tone.
I have the facts and I'm not afraid to destroy you with it.
But I get it. You can't 'show' people the truth. You sometimes have to beat it over their heads with a collective outrage that makes you sleepless.
I see, I see. It's so Seattle.
Don’t get me
wrong, I absolutely love the area I’m in. It’s bluer then a Smurf’s penis and
the people for the most part are tolerant even when their deodorant isn’t. But I think as progressives we tirelessly end up fighting each other wanting a mile when we might only get an inch. And when we 'fight' the other side with flow charts and customized facts (also known as real facts) we forget that we may be talking to someone who doesn't speak our language: (reality)
Rage Against the Machine said, "Your anger is a gift."
And what better way then to give it to others? It's the gift that keeps on giving.
My vote used to matter. I used to live in Ohio, the heart of it all. (We've had a couple of heart surgeries and we are just doing fine)
I get that people out here are pissed that an election might be decided by a couple of states that are living in 1985 (not a bad year for music just throwing that out there?)
But don't worry Seattle and Pacific Northwest. The world isn't over. As 'Winter is Coming" And the Game of Throned Midwest "White Walkers" like me come here we are just looking for jobs.
And to change your babies over to us. We will talk to strangers. Look puppy eyed at you and talk in accents and our cartoonish demeanor will grow and grow and pretty soon it won't matter that nuclear radiation has captured the Puget Sound.
Puget Sound will become the Pungent Sound and Frances Farmer will have her revenge on Seattle.
Enjoy your last days............
Just kidding. We have time. So Love the one's your with.
Just don't drink the Poison to fast kids.
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